Calm Skies Ahead: Navigating Toddler Tantrums on Airplanes

You’re thousands of feet in the air, strapped into a metal tube hurtling through the sky, and just as you settle in to watch a movie or catch some Zs, the soundtrack of your journey becomes the wails and foot-thuds of a tiny human in full meltdown mode right behind you. Before you clasp your hands over your ears or shoot a glare over your seat, let’s talk about what’s really happening here and how we can all contribute to calmer skies.

Understanding Children’s Temper Tantrums on Flights

Children and their temper tantrums are a normal part of their developmental process. These scenes of screaming, kicking, and crying are their way of dealing with a world that is not always subservient to their will. Dr. Jennifer Katzenstein, Director of Psychology and Neuropsychology at Johns Hopkins Children’s Hospital, stated that understanding these outbreaks is the first step towards effectively managing them.

Most of the time, these emotional outbursts last for a few to 15 minutes, after which children usually recover and continue their day as if nothing had happened. But what would you do when all of this takes place in the narrow space of an airplane cabin, with the audience being exhausted travelers as witnesses?

Strategies for Managing and Dealing with Tantrums on Flights

As suggested by Dr. Katzenstein, the key is to remain calm and actively ignore such behavior. This means separating from children who get angry – without eye contact, engaging in different activities, and basically pretending that their temper hasn’t happened. This is a challenging problem, especially in public places like airplanes where getting angry can be magnified up close.

But why should we ignore it? Isn’t this allowing bad behavior? Far from it. Our attention is a powerful tool for behavior management. By ignoring negative behavior (in this case, getting angry), we avoid reinforcing it. Then, once the child stops throwing tantrums, acknowledge their positive behavior with specific compliments, such as “Thank you for sitting quietly,” reinforcing the behavior we want to encourage.

Parents, if you read this article while worrying about the next family flight, you can do more. Being prepared for potential triggers and maintaining daily routines as much as possible can help prevent outbursts before they occur. Providing a five minute warning before the transition, offering a choice between two options, and ensuring that the child’s physical needs (such as hunger and fatigue) are met can have a significant impact.

But what about the rest of us? Those who don’t have children, or whose children have already passed the stage of throwing tantrums? This is where empathy and understanding come into play. Recognizing that temper tantrums in toddlers are a normal part of development, rather than a sign of poor parenting or “bad” children, can help us maintain patience. Providing a compassionate smile instead of frowning can greatly alleviate parents’ stress, as they may feel embarrassed and stressed.

If the anger escalates to the point where the child may harm themselves or others, encourage parents to intervene, and if possible, move to a more personal place. As passengers, we can provide assistance – whether it’s helping with luggage handling, distracting attention, or just saying a nice word.

Ultimately, the goal is mutual support. Traveling with children is not an easy task, raising a child requires a village – even at an altitude of 35000 feet. By staying calm, practicing empathy, and understanding the reasons behind the crying, we can all contribute to a more peaceful journey, not only for the families involved, but also for all passengers sharing the narrow space of the plane.

Remember, the next time you find yourself sharing a flight with a struggling little human, take a deep breath, guide your inner meditation, and consider what you can do to help everyone’s flight go smoother. After all, we are all together, and with a little patience and understanding, we can ensure that all travelers have a peaceful sky.

Related posts:
When to Worry about Toddler Temper Tantrums
Toddler Tantrums: Hitting, Kicking, Scratching, and Biting
Biting, Hitting, Kicking And Other Challenging Toddler Behavior